Xemnas's Little Black Book
by iRideSaix
Summary: It's Xemnas's birthday, and Saïx gets him a diary. Everyone else in Organization XIII finds out about it, finds the diary, and reads it. However, Xemnas's most inner thoughts begin to disturb everyone. Xemsai
1. Chapter 1: Little Black Book

Summary:

It's Xemnas's birthday, and Saïx gets him a diary. Everyone else in Organization XIII finds out about it, finds the diary, and reads it. However, Xemnas's most inner thoughts begin to disturb everyone. Not much of a plot, but you get to find out what Xemnas thinks, and that could be fun. Heh heh...

* * *

Chapter 1: The Little Black Book

It was another "normal" day in the Castle That Never Was. Axel, Roxas, and Demyx were sitting on the sofa minding their own business when—

"AAAAAAAAAUUUUUUUGGGGGHHHHH!!!! MARLUXIA!!!!"

Normal? Well… that's why it's "normal" instead of just plain normal…

Axel sighed as Vexen marched into the room with Marluxia chasing after him. Upon seeing Vexen half dressed and Marluxia completely naked, Axel and Demyx grimaced while Roxas, totally oblivious, just sat there.

"You touched me!" Vexen accused, jabbing Marluxia's chest.

In response, Marluxia, of course, laughed nervously.

"That is the _last_ time you will _ever_ come into my room while I am getting dressed!" Vexen continued. "Why, I should report this to the Superior. Let's see what he says when I tell him about your strange activity as of late."

"Hey, dudes," Xigbar said, walking in the room. "So, uh, anybody care to explain why you guys are having a stripping party without me?"

"Xigbar," Demyx said, "Would you really wanna see Marluxia stripping and/or naked?"

"As if," was the simple reply. "Anyway," he said again "what did you guys get for the Superior's birthday? I have no clue as to what I'm getting for him."

"Xemnas's birthday, you say?" Vexen asked. "I had no clue it was his birthday… I guess I'll have to conjure something _special_ for him."

"Uh…I don't wanna know what that's supposed to mean," Roxas said, shivering.

"Saïx claims that Xemnas has been telling us all what he wants for his birthday for two months now, but I don't remember anything like that. I asked doggy boy what Xemnas said, but he wouldn't tell me. As if…"

"You know how Saïx is about Xemnas…" Marluxia said, surprising everyone.

"What do you mean by _that_?" Vexen asked, stroking his chin in his customary way.

"Why don't you ask Xigbar that?"

"Xigbar…?"

"As if," he replied. "I'm not telling you suckers anything." He turned to Marluxia. "And how would _you_ know?"

"I've had my fair share of spying—you should know that much already. Anyway, it's getting quite breezy down here. I'll be leaving now."

"Good," Axel mumbled under his breath.

"I heard that…"

"Marluxia has a nice butt," Vexen said, sighing as his eyes followed Marluxia all the way down the hallway. His remark was followed by an awkward silence. He cleared his throat in response. "Well, then… I guess I'll be leaving, as well."

"Hmm… I'd never seen Vexen's bare chest before," commented Axel. "Not that impressive, though."

"Yeah…"

* * *

The thirteen members of Organization XIII sat around in their prospective "thrones" as Xemnas opened his birthday presents.

"To make sure I know that I get gift from _everyone_ this year, I shall open them in order of rank. So, Xigbar, let's see what I get from you this year." The Superior opened the gift which was inside a shiny, red box.

As he began to open the present, Xemnas thought back to his birthday last year. He had opened Xigbar's gift, and fake snakes had popped right out of it. Leaving the past behind, Xemnas sighed as he noticed the smug smirk on Xigbar's face. He wouldn't be tricked by Number Two again. How embarrassing it had been.

Xemnas looked around for one of the more useless members of the organization. "Luxord!" he finally exclaimed. "This year, I want _you_ to open my gift from Xigbar."

Xemnas then looked over to Xigbar whose sly smile stayed put. Xemnas frowned slightly.

"It would be my honor, old chap!" Luxord said proudly.

_'Yeah, yeah,'_ thought Xemnas. _'Just get on with it, "old chap."'_

Xemnas transported the present over to Luxord and waited patiently for the snakes. _However_, they didn't come. A deep frown sunk in on the Superior's face as Luxord pulled out a Star Wars light saber. Xemnas was glad that there were no snakes, angry that he had made such a big deal with prevention, and curious as to why Xigbar gave him…a light saber—a _Star Wars_ light saber.

Xigbar sensed the inquiring look on Number One's face. "I know you're not a Star Wars fan, dude, but I thought it would make a nice gift considering your choice of weapon."

"Right…"

After going through the first six gifts—which were absolutely thoughtless and horrid, mind you—Xemnas picked up the eighth present which was from Axel. Xemnas opened the box and jumped as four fake snakes shot out at his face. Xemnas, his cheeks turning slightly red, glared at Axel. Axel smirked while Xigbar flat out laughed.

* * *

Saïx was in Xemnas's office, standing over the Superior with a gray box in his hands.

"I know how you didn't like the gifts that everyone else gave you, so I got you something I know you'd enjoy. So, um, Happy Birthday, Superior," Saïx said. He handed Xemnas the box.

"Ah, gray," Xemnas replied. "It's my favorite color. How thoughtful of you."

Xemnas saw a smile appear on Saïx's face, no thicker than the thinnest crescent moon. "There's no need to be hesitant, Xemnas. Snakes won't pop out at you." Saïx just couldn't resist saying it. His remark was returned with a friendly scowl.

Xemnas opened the present and pulled out a little black book.

"Um, it's a diary, sir," XII said, getting a little red in the face. "Y-you've always said how you wanted one…"

"Thank you so much, Saïx! I—" Xemnas just barely caught himself from saying "I love you" to Saïx, but he couldn't stop himself from shooting up from his seat and hugging Saïx with a passion. After hugging him, Xemnas sat back down just as quickly as he got up and acted like nothing had happened. "Well, thank you for your gift Saïx. Carry on."

Too shocked to say anything, Saïx hobbled away out of the room, his arms still stuck to the sides of his torso where Xemnas had squished them in with his hug.

Xemnas took a deep breath. He really had always wanted a diary, almost more than he wanted a heart. He supposed that writing down his feelings was as close as he was going to get to having a heart as just a simple Nobody. That Saïx… Always looking out for him… Thinking about Saïx always gave Xemnas a warm feeling in chest.

* * *

That's it for chapter one! There will most likely be a chapter two. I don't know about anything after that...

P.S. Please Review! Thanks =D


	2. Chapter 2: Diary SnatchandRead Team

Author's Quick Note: Yay, it's chapter two. I wrote this one fairly quickly. Be on the look out for more chapters. By the way, I do not own Kingdom Hearts or its characters, but one day I will for all its base are belong to me. I don't own that phrase, either.

* * *

Chapter 2: Diary Snatch-and-Read Team

The next day, Axel, Xigbar, and Xaldin were sitting on the sofa crowded around a laptop.

"I-it's so cute…!" Axel said, his eyes glistening. Xigbar laughed at the redhead's comment.

Xaldin smiled to himself and said, "Axel, you pervert."

"They made him so cute… I can't help it."

The three nobodies were watching a YouTube flash animation of Roxas dancing and singing to the song "Marissa Stole the Precious Thing." Just then, Roxas walked into the room.

"Axel, what's with your face?" asked Roxas, commenting on Axel's "OMGsqueeit'ssocute" expression.

"Look for yourself, dude." Xigbar turned the laptop around so the screen faced Roxas.

"Oh, that thing?" he asked, casually. "I've seen it a bunch of times." He crossed his arms. "Actually, I can act it out, just like it is in the video."

"REALLY!?" Axel jumped from his seat and completely clobbered Roxas. "You have to do it for us!"

"A-axel…?"

"Get off the boy, and then maybe he _can_." Xaldin shook his head disapprovingly.

Once Axel had gotten off of Roxas, Roxas performed. After Roxas was done, Axel grabbed Roxas and hoisted him over his shoulder like a sack of potatoes.

"Huh!? Axel, what are you doing…?"

"That was _so_ cute! You're coming with me!"

"I forgot to mention that Axel's a little…drunk," Xigbar said, waving an empty bottle of beer in the air.

"NOOOOOO!!!!!" Roxas screamed as Axel carried him off.

"Have fun, you two!" Xigbar sighed.

"You are such a bad person," Xaldin said, once again shaking his head disapprovingly.

"As i—"

"Guys, guys, guys!" Marluxia yelled, practically flying down the hallway and into the room. "You'll never believe what I found out yesterday!"

"What—you finally found out that Larxene's a man?"

"Huh? She—I mean _he_—is a man?" Marluxia smiled devilishly to himself. "This means I'll have a new person to spy on. I never spied on her_—him_—" he giggled "before so I didn't know. Thanks for telling me, but, no. That's not what I had to say. I was going to tell you that Saïx got the Superior a diary for his birthday yesterday, and Xemnas is actually writing in it!"

"Oh, really?" Xigbar asked, interested. "Do you think that, maybe, we could get that diary of his and read it for ourselves?"

"That could bear some interesting results," said Xaldin.

"Indeed," replied the pink-haired nobody. "Between my snooping skills, your sneaky tactics, Xigbar, and your amazing skill of reading to audiences, Xaldin, we could have a diary snatch-and-read team going in no time."

"So, it's a plan, then?" Xaldin asked, crossing his arms over his chest.

"Yup!" Marluxia exclaimed, giving Xaldin a cheesy thumbs-up.

"Don't ever do that again," he hissed.

"Aw… Anyway, I've got to go tell Vexen about this!"

"As if," Xigbar said in response. "You tell anyone about this, and I can guarantee that your butt is mine."

"Ooh, I'd like that—"

"As if," snapped Xigbar. "Bad choice of words, but if you tell anyone then I will personally kill you and jizz on the tomb you'd be buried in."

Marluxia grimaced. "Right…"

Xigbar nodded approvingly to himself.

"Anyway, I'm off to go spy on Larxene! She's done a really good job of covering up her manly figure. Well, _he_ has. Maybe he's like Axel or something."

"Yeah, Axel has some crazy hips. Maybe he's a woman." Xigbar laughed. "I guess that means that Roxas is in for a real ride."

Marluxia laughed, as well.

"I don't even want to know what you meant by that," Xaldin said.

Marluxia then skipped off. "Larxene, I'm coming, my manly love!"

Xaldin turned to Xigbar. "Larxene is really a man?"

"As if," Xigbar snickered. "I just want to see that pansy Marluxia get smacked around by Larxene."

"Good one."

"Oh, and another thing. What was with the 'I will jizz on your tomb' comment?"

"Oh, Xemnas said that to me once. Back when we were Somebodies."

"Really, now?"

* * *

Xemnas sat in his office, just finishing the second entry in his diary. He had written the first one the day before. He sighed as he closed the book and laid his black pen beside it.

"I think I'll go visit Kingdom Hearts… Hopefully my Saïx will be there already." Xemnas slipped his customary black coat on and walked out of the room, carefully closing the door behind him—however, he didn't lock it.

This might have been a good time to play the song "Somebody's Watching Me" by Mysto and Pizzi—to add the drama, of course.

After making sure that the coast was clear, Xigbar slid inside the room. Marluxia, however, came through the vents in the ceiling and dropped down to the floor.

"You creeper," scoffed Xigbar.

"What is a 'crepper'?" asked Marluxia who obviously had not heard Xigbar correctly.

"Not 'crepper.' Creeper!"

"Crepper, as in 'crushed pepper'?" Marluxia inquired, ignoring Xigbar. "Like a 'crape,' which is a 'cranberry' and a 'grape' mixed together. ...I think. It's something like that."

"What? Ugh, whatever. Let's just nab the diary and get out of here. When do you think ol' Xemnas'll get back?"

"Well, he's normally at the Altar of Naught for at least two hours everyday. He hasn't gone yet today, so we'll be safe for a while. Also, he and Saïx might get caught up in some kind of…conversation," said Marluxia, matter-of-factly.

"In that case, we won't have to return this 'library book' for at least three or four hours." Xigbar grabbed Xemnas's diary from the desk. "Furthermore, I don't even wanna know why you have Xemnas's daily schedule mapped out in your head."

"Let's just say I did a little extra studying for our diary-swiping exhibition."

"Ew…"

As they headed for the door, Axel appeared in front of it, looking extremely groggy.

"Have fun with Roxas?" Xigbar asked, folding his arms.

"Stop talking so loudly… Anyway, what are you talking about?" Axel said, massaging his temples.

"Nothing," Xigbar lied. "I'm just kidding you."

"What's wrong?" asked Marluxia.

"I don't know. Hangover, I guess. I remember having a drink with Xigbar and Xaldin, but after that, nothing. I just woke up naked not too long ago…"

Xigbar snickered, but Axel ignored him.

"I came to see if the Superior had any aspirin, but I guess he's not in. So, what are you guys up to, anyway?"

Marluxia and Xigbar exchanged glances.

"I suppose we could tell him," Xigbar said.

Marluxia nodded. "Saïx got Xemnas a diary for his birthday, and we decided to take a look at it. You know how everyone is always wondering what goes on inside Xemnas's head."

"You're right about that. Well, once I recover from this nasty hangover, you guys better let me in on this." Axel moaned a little before saying, "Don't worry, I won't tell a soul."

"You got that right. Or else—"

"He'll personally kill you and jizz on the tomb you'd be buried in," Marluxia said with an oddly happy tone.

"I don't even want to know where _that_ came from," Axel said.

* * *

Later that day, while Axel recovered from his hangover and before Xemnas's diary was read, extremely loud and disturbing voices could be heard coming from Larxene's room.

"MARLUXIA!!! WHAT THE HECK ARE YOU DOING MY ROOM!? I'M FREAKING NAKED!!!"

"AUGH!! Xigbar was wrong when we said you were a man!"

"_What!?_ _A man!?_ Do I look like a _man_ to you, Marluxia!?"

"Heck no!"

"You—and Xigbar—are both—_DEAD_!!!"

* * *

The end of chapter two! Fyi, I don't own Marissa Stole the Precious Thing or the video that was made for it. I also do not own "Somebody's Watching Me," but, however, I can give you the links to the videos. I don't own YouTube, either. or Kingdom Hearts or its characters. Geez, what _do _I own...Oh, I own this story! =D Yay.

Marissa Stole the Precious Thing by IYOSIS .com/watch?v=jOZzhllXtNA

Somebody's Watching Me by Mysto & Pizzi .com/watch?v=xkf95onRgcc

Please review, favorite, look out for more chapters, and, most importantly, read this fanfic! =D ~iRideSaïx


	3. Chapter 3: Story Time

Author's Quick Note: Sorry for the wait. Actually, I'm not sure if a week is a long wait or not...Probably not. Anyway, I made a mistake with the links at the end of chapter two. Heh.

Marissa Stole the Precious Thing by IYOSIS /watch?v=jOZzhllXtNA

Somebody's Watching Me by Mysto & Pizzi /watch?v=xkf95onRgcc

* * *

Chapter 3: Story Time

Xigbar and Xaldin sat on the couch waiting for Marluxia and Axel to come downstairs for the reading of Xemnas's diary.

Axel came down the hallway humming "Marissa Stole the Precious Thing." Roxas followed shortly behind him.

"I have this song stuck in my head," he said to Roxas. "I don't remember ever hearing it before, and, yet, here I am humming it."

"Uh…"

"Glad to see you're all better, Axel," Xigbar said, grinning.

Axel glared at Number II. "I know it was you who got me drunk."

"You got that right."

Unlike Xigbar, Xaldin noticed Roxas standing behind Axel. "What's the shrimp doing here, Axel?"

"You know very well that Zexion isn't here," Axel retorted. Xigbar laughed to this. "I'm just kidding. You can trust Roxas, right?" He ruffled Roxas's blonde hair.

"Hey don't do that…"

"Fine," said Xaldin just as Marluxia walked into the room looking either like a ghost or like he had just seen one.

"Dude, you look like death," commented Xigbar.

Marluxia spoke, his voice wavering intensely. "She…she blinded me with…with—"

"Science?" asked Axel.

"Herpes?" asked Xigbar.

"Her ugly face?" asked Xaldin.

"…A blinding light?" asked Roxas.

They all turned to Roxas. "…That was the first thing that came to mind."

"As were the rest of our fill-ins," said Xigbar.

"No," Marluxia said. "It wasn't that—well, she _does_ have an ugly face." Xaldin nodded approvingly. "But, she definitely is _not_ a man. I've been scarred for life."

He slumped over to the sofa and practically died on it.

"Anyway, now that we are all present and accounted for, I will begin reading Xemnas's diary aloud for you to hear." Xaldin cleared his throat and began:

_"Entry 1_

_"Today is my birthday, and my sweet, sweet Saïx got me this lovely diary. All my life as a Nobody, I've wanted a diary, and finally, because of Saïx, I was able to get one. So, this entry will be dedicated to him._

_"That reminds me. When Saïx gave me this, I almost told him of my feelings for him. I just barely caught myself from saying it, but I still couldn't control my body. Diary, I _actually hugged Saïx! _He seemed extremely shocked afterward, but I guess I would be that way, too. I just hope he feels the same way about me. His face was all red when he left. Maybe that's a hint or something. I really don't know._

_"Also, I think I'll let a different member get groceries for tomorrow. I suppose Vexen could get the job done sufficiently enough. I mean, how hard is it to get groceries? Although… I did happen to come across a Kingdom Hearts parody comic on the internet the other day. The author of the comic made me buy…tampons for Larxene. Honestly, I don't even think she uses those kinds of things. There's all these rumors going around the Castle, and everyone says that she's a man. I find it funny, but I don't tell anyone that. Also, the others don't know that I go through the internet history after everyone's done. The things these guys watch…a lot of it is just porn and parodies of something. Luxord most certainly enjoys Lord of the Rings._

_"Going back to the rumors… There're a lot of rumors about me and various other Organization members that really don't make all that much sense to me—on the internet, I mean. There are a lot on Fan Fiction, as well. I like to go there and read all the ones about Saïx and me. Let's see. Axel and I is kind of popular as well as Zexion and I. Our Somebodies were both apprentices under Ansem the Wise, but come on! Everyone should know that I love Saïx. That's common knowledge."_

"Does is it really say that!?" Roxas exclaimed.

"Yes," Xaldin said, coolly.

"Me and…the Superior?" Axel asked, horrified.

"Apparently that's what the fangirls like," replied Marluxia.

"Ha-ha, he totally dissed Larxene," Xigbar said, once again laughing.

"Yeah, I guess you're right about that," said Axel.

"Keep reading, Xaldy!" Marluxia winked at Xaldin.

"Don't ever do _that_ again, either!" spat Xaldin. Then, he picked up his place in Xemnas's diary.

_"I am _very_ disappointed in Axel. I was totally expecting the snakes to come out of Xigbar's gift again, not Axel's. It was so embarrassing, too—right in front of Saïx! Saïx even teased me for it just now. He rarely ever teases me or anything of the sort. Ugh, this is enough ranting for me. It's getting quite late, and I think I'll stop writing for now…"_

"The first entry ends there," said Xaldin, closing the diary.

"Wow…At least now we know what he thinks about things," Marluxia remarked. "But, now I want to hear more."

"Too bad," Xaldin said. "That's all he's written so far." He handed the diary to Xigbar and asked him, "Same time tomorrow?"

Marluxia butt in, "I'll have to do some more research and find out the Superior's plans for tomorrow." Following this statement were awkward glances exchanged between everyone except Xigbar and Marluxia.

* * *

That was interesting...Anyway, I hope you liked this installment.

By the way, I'm not trying to pair Xigbar with Xaldin or Marluxia or anything like that. Just in case you were wondering.

And FYI, "she blinded me with science" is an old song. I don't remember who it's by, but yeah.


	4. Chapter 4: Strange Sightings

Author's Note: Hi, I'm back with the next installment.

* * *

Chapter 4: Strange Sightings

It was inferred that most of the readers of this Kingdom Hearts Fanfic want nothing more out of this than to just read Xemnas's diary. So, we shall skip right on ahead to that.

With Xigbar, Marluxia, Axel, and Roxas sitting around the room waiting patiently, Xaldin began reading aloud second entry of Xemnas's diary:

_"Entry 2_

_"I quite enjoyed my birthday yesterday. It was a good day. However, despite how much I wanted it to be, today was not good…It wasn't even normal. Actually, "odd" wouldn't even begin to describe it._

_"Yesterday, as I mentioned, I decided to allow a new member of the Organization to do the grocery shopping—two words: big mistake. I chose Number IV, Vexen, to do this week's shopping. Unfortunately, Vexen bought Hot Pockets—and _only_ Hot Pockets. I seriously walked into the kitchen this morning, and there were boxes upon boxes of Hot Pockets. I mean, they were literally overflowing from the freezer. At first, I thought it was some kind of prank or that—I don't even know! Although, some good came out of the situation: there wasn't any space in the freezer for the ice cream, so it gave me an excuse to eat it all. Anyway, I knew that Vexen had an unnatural desire for Hot Pockets, but still… I asked him why in the name of Kingdom Hearts had he gone and bought so many, but he simply said that they were very efficient for him, in the sense that it doesn't take much long to make them and that he could eat them while researching or conducting some experiment or other."_

"So, it _was_ Vexen that bought all of those stupid Hot Pockets! I was so angry that there weren't any waffles this morning for breakfast," exclaimed Axel, a bit ticked off.

"Hot Pockets!" Marluxia sang the little Hot Pockets jingle.

_"Ah, well. Aside from the Hot Pockets," _Xaldin continued _"my day has still been a bit weird. I think I may be hallucinating; although, considering some of the things I might have seen, I could just be seeing things that were actually there. I think I'll start with Marluxia…"_

Marluxia laughed nervously at Xemnas's mentioning his name.

"What did you do!?" Roxas asked, but was only answered with more of Marluxia's nervous laughter. "Right…"

_"Marluxia is the man who has some problems that should probably be dealt with, but most likely will not be. Before I go on to say what I saw, I shall explain some things about Marluxia. Marluxia is…Well, he's Marluxia. And, he has pink hair, which is really strange and girly, but in a really funny way. I secretly want to laugh my butt off every time I see his ridiculous hair._

"_And, speaking of ridiculous hair, some of our other members have some really strange hair. Like Larxene…I think those things hanging from her hairline are little antennas that turn her on 'bitch mode' when someone comes near her. Then, there's Axel, whose hair looks as if it's been gelled so the points at the tips can be used to stab someone. Demyx, too, seems to use too much hair gel—scary. Zexion seems to have tried to pull off an emo hairstyle, and I believe that he does it in order to attract all those crazy fangirls of his. It makes up for his shortness. Xaldin, on the other hand, has…Well, I don't really know. His hair is just plain weird—_hey! Now, that's not very nice of the Superior! Putting me down is just plain cruel."

"And, dissing the others isn't?" Roxas asked.

Upon hearing Xemnas's description of the other members caused an eruption of laughter from Xigbar.

"Hmph." Axel crossed his arms and bent his head, tiny pout lines creasing the sides of his mouth.

"I like my hair…" Marluxia stroked the pinkness.

Xaldin frowned and began reading once more. _"Anyway, it seems that I have gotten off topic. Marluxia: he practically rapes all of us. Well, some of us. Not me. Let's see, he particularly gets a little too close to Zexion and Axel at times. They are his side dishes, but his "main course" everyday is butt of Vexen. Seriously, I'm not kidding. I'm not quite sure what he sees in Vexen, especially with that creepy laugh of his. But, then again, creepy (Vexen) and creepier (Marluxia) always go together._

"_Okay, back to the strange sights of the day. I'm pretty sure I saw Marluxia's face in the most random places. And, it was only his face—not his hair, not his clothes, and not anything else of him—just his face. I saw his face in the light bulb that illuminates my office, in the top that belonged to the bucket of ice cream, in the water in the toilet bowl, and even in Xigbar's eye patch!"_

"What!?" Xigbar literally choked on his own laugh.

Ignoring Xigbar's outburst and frantic scanning of his eye patch, Xaldin read on. _"Particularly, though, seeing Marluxia's silly face in the toilet literally scared the pee out of me…Not exactly pleasant."_

Xaldin turned to Marluxia. "Is this what you meant by your 'research'?"

Marluxia's lips parted into a deviant smile. "Why, yes. Yes it is."

"How—and why—were in you in my eye patch!?" Xigbar rose to his feet.

"I don't think you really want to know," Number XI replied. "You…you might jizz on my tomb…"

"What?" inquired Roxas.

"As i—wait, no," Xigbar said, completely ignoring Roxas. "I just might actually do that. Better watch yourself, pinky." He let out a casual laugh.

"Heading back to the book now…"

_"Another really weird thing I saw today was Roxas. I just so happened to be in Saïx's room earlier because I was looking for my Mickey Mouse pen—I think Saïx must've taken it on accident or something. Anyway, I sensed someone coming and, just as I looked up from Saïx's underwear drawer, I observed little Number XIII skipping down the hallway. I don't know him all that well, but skipping just doesn't seem like something he'd normally do—or, at least, something that he wouldn't do in the presence of others. I suppose he thought that no one would be around. At least I won't tell anyone. I can actually keep secrets."_

"Roxas, why were you skip—" began Axel.

"Carry on!"

All eyes momentarily went to Roxas.

_"Besides the "normal" strange things I see from day to day, I just so happened to witness something I'd thought I would never see. The final odd occurrence of the day—so far, because I'm almost positive that I'll see something else that's not quite right—was Saïx. I was walking into my bedroom not too long ago, and I found Saïx in my dressing room wearing one of my more fancy cloaks. It was the white one, I believe, with the black streaks across it. Saïx was wearing the outfit, a glimmer in his eyes, and he was turning from side to side, observing how it looked on him. It seems so unlike him to take a liking to an article of clothing, but I guess you never really know a person until they think that no one's looking. That's something I've come to know living in a castle full of the strangest Nobodies. I don't believe that Saïx ever realized that I was there, watching him, for he even stripped out of the coat right there, right in front of my eyes. And what a beautiful sight it was, with his—"_

Just then, Xemnas and Vexen walked into the kitchen which was directly connected to the room where Xaldin and the others were sitting. Xaldin quickly shoved the diary under a pillow placed on the sofa.

"Now, would you _please_ take these dreaded Hot Pockets out of the kitchen and put them in your own storage? No one here eats these things besides you," the Superior was saying.

"Of course, Superior," said Vexen, as if he was glad to serve Xemnas, when, in reality, he wanted to freeze him on the spot with his ice and do horrible things to his frozen form. That would most certainly teach him a lesson.

Xemnas turned to Xigbar, Xaldin, and the others, looking each one in the face before speaking again. "Have any of you seen Saïx?"

They all answered "no" and Xemnas walked on, slowly, though, with a quizzical look on his face.

Roxas let out a sigh while Xaldin read the last part of the entry. His eyes widened, and he showed Xigbar.

"Whoa, ho, ho, _Xemnas_!"

Xemnas came back into the room that instant. "What was that, Number II?"

"Whoa, ho, ho, Xemnas…" Xigbar improvised "…Nice butt you have there."

Xemnas blushed faintly, but that soon faded away. He frowned, instead. "Don't you have work to do?"

"Yeah."

A pause.

"Aren't you going to do it?"

"As if."

"Of course…" Finally, Xemnas left, but for real this time.

"What was that last part in the entry?" Axel asked.

"Nothing you need to hear," replied Xaldin.

Xigbar laughed.

"You know I'm really getting tired of all of your laughing, Xigbar," Axel sneered.

"As if," he said, giving his customary remark.

On the way to returning the diary to its rightful place, Xigbar let Marluxia read what Xemnas had written. His remark was not meant to be repeated.

* * *

Wasn't _that_ fun!? ...Heh. Well, now you know a little more of what goes on inside the Castle that Never Was when no one's around to see it (as far as everyone else has supposed).

Hmm...I'm already getting ideas for chapter five (I come up with things to write as I go: I'm no planner when it comes to things like this. Therefore, there's no need for a real plot. And, besides, improv stories like these are always fun to both read and write. So, it's a win-win situation, yeah?)

This chapter wasn't as funny as the others—or, at least, in my opinion it wasn't. I have a feeling that chapter five may be a little more disturbing in the funny sense. You'll just have to wait and read.

So, anyway, thanks for all your support and stuff, please continue to read, and PLEASE review! Thanks so much, guys! See you next chapter~


	5. Chapter 5: My Saïx’s Ecstasy

Author's Note: Hi, guys! We meet again in chapter five! Okay, so the reason that this chapter is titled "_My_ Saïx's Ecstasy" is because Xemnas kept saying "_my_ Saïx this" and "_my_ Saïx that" in his diary. I don't own Saïx....even though I wish I did! And, F.Y.I., the reason I put in Roxas skipping in the previous chapter was because some of my friends and I were watching the cut scenes for Kingdom Hearts 358/2 Days on my DS, and this one scene was titled as "Roxas Passes By," and the three of us all thought that is sounded like Roxas was randomly skipping down a hallway. XD Well, anyway, on with the story!

* * *

Chapter 5: My Saïx's Ecstasy

"Beer pong," Axel said.

"What?" Saïx and Luxord asked in unison.

The three Nobodies were standing around the ping-pong table that Axel had pushed in front of the couch.

"You heard me," the redhead said again, crossing his arms. "Beer pong. I think you should play it. It's really fun, and I can guarantee you, Saïx, that the odds of winning against Luxord are a lot fairer than the odds of winning against him in poker."

Saïx frowned. "And why should I play this?"

"Geez, you need to lighten up! It's a game, so you play it have fun." Axel turned to Luxord. "As for you, I think you should play so we can all get a break from seeing you win at everything."

"Bloody mate, you should know that I always win at _every_ game I play."

"Yeah, yeah."

* * *

Saïx and Luxord stood on opposite sides of the beer pong table with paddles in their hands while the rest of the Organization were someplace else in the room where they could see the game. Lexaeus stood ready by the ping-pong table with cans of beer in his hands, and Axel stood next to him.

"Okay, everyone," Number VIII began. "You two know how to play ping-pong, right?"

Saïx and Luxord nodded.

"My version of beer pong is pretty much the same. Whenever you score a point, the other player has to take a swig of beer. First person to…however many points I say wins."

Luxord nodded once more, but Saïx frowned again. What was he getting himself into?

Maybe by habit, maybe for strength, Saïx looked over to Xemnas who gave him a nervous, but cheering smile. Whatever reason Saïx looked to Xemnas, the smile didn't help because of two reasons.

Axel raised his arm, and, before thrusting it back down, shouted, "Saïx vs. Luxord. The match begins!"

The first reason was that Saïx had never even had alcohol before. He had always needed a clear head, and all that alcohol would defeat the purpose.

Luxord served the ball, and, even though Saïx put forth his whole effort to return it, he failed—epically.

The second reason that Saïx was so nervous was that he sucked horribly at ping-pong.

"Saïx fails—I mean, he doesn't get the point." Axel gave the blue-haired Nobody a mischievous smirk then shifted his gaze over to Roxas, the scorekeeper, to signal that Luxord's point could be tallied.

All eyes fell on Saïx.

"Go on," Marluxia, acting as the cheerleader, said. "S-A-I with funny dots-X!"

"Shut up!" Xigbar got up from his seat, grabbed a can of beer, and chucked it at Marluxia who immediately ducked. The can hit the wall, instead, and exploded.

"Xigbar!" Xemnas yelled, standing to his feet.

"Oops…"

Saïx felt extremely grateful for the interruption, hoping that everyone would be distracted and forget about the ping-pong match—BUT, they didn't. Too bad.

"Come on, Saïx," Axel said. "Drink it."

Lexaeus poured the light brown liquid into Saïx's cup.

"Drink up, and drink it all," said Axel.

Saïx grimaced, but he knew he had to give in. He took a deep breath, and swallowed the vile drink down. It didn't taste bad, but, then again, it didn't exactly taste good either. He then placed the cup back down on the table, noticing the still-expectant stares from everyone. "What?" he asked and served the ball.

Luxord returned the ball back to him in an instant, and, as everyone expected, Saïx was unable to hit it back.

Again, Saïx was forced to consume another cup of beer.

"Wow, Saïx really sucks at ping-pong," Larxene said with a devilish laugh, her voice clearly loud enough so that Number VII himself could hear her.

"Yes, but, looking at him now, it seems pretty obvious to me that he wouldn't be so great at things like this," commented Zexion.

Saïx glared at everyone as they all agreed to Larxene and Zexion's statements—well, Xemnas didn't agree with them, but he didn't object, either, for fear that everyone would discover his "secret" love for Saïx. He had no clue that Xigbar, Marluxia, and the others had been reading his diary all along, and, thus, knew the secret without being told of it.

The next ten minutes were filled with, in chronological order, Luxord scoring against Saïx, Lexaeus pouring beer for Saïx, Saïx drinking that beer, and the whole sequence of events happening over and over again. Soon, Saïx began to feel tipsy and then drunk. He felt kind of dizzy with an extreme sense of happiness. The feeling seemed to come out of nowhere, but he…liked it—a lot, actually.

Luxord, his body completely free of alcohol at the moment, scored another point, but Saïx wasn't angry about it anymore. Instead, he took the cup that Lexaeus had just poured, drank it in one gulp, got down on one knee in front of Xemnas, and asked him, "Will you marry me, Xemmy?"

Saïx's action completely shocked everyone in the room, as it had seemed so out of the blue on account of the fact that Saïx had been failing at beer pong whilst looking emotionless as usual.

Xemnas was so surprised that, after a bunch of jumbled words tumbled from his lips, the only thing decipherable from it was, "W-what?"

"You heard me!" Saïx said, boldly. He stood to his feet, pulling Xemnas up with him. The next thing Saïx said was strangely tearful. "I," he sniffed, "I just wanted you to know that I love you…with all my non-existent heart. And, even though we Nobodies don't have hearts, you make me feel like I have one." He placed his hand to where his heart would be.

"Aww…" Axel walked over to Roxas and pulled him in, so that the blonde's head rested against his chest.

"Axel!? W-what the heck?"

Saïx took Xemnas's speechlessness as…well, know one knows. "How about I sing you a song that will tell you exactly how I feel?" Saïx giggled and set up the karaoke machine.

Then, the song, Ecstasy by ATB, began, and Saïx sang. Surprisingly, it sounded really good.

_"__Have you ever noticed that I'm not acting as I used to do before? Have you ever wondered why I always keep on coming back for more? What have you done to me? I'll never be the same; I'll tell you for sure. I'll never be the same; I'll tell you for sure. I'll never be the same; I'll tell you for sure, oh!"_

Saïx came closer to Xemnas and caressed his cheeks, bright red with embarrassment.

"_You really are my ecstasy, my real life fantasy, oh yeah. You really are my ecstasy, my real life fantasy, oh yeah."_

"Sing it, Saïx!" Marluxia cheered.

"Shut up, you fruity bastard," Xaldin scowled.

"'Fruity'!?"

"_Not that I'm complaining. A more beautiful vision—I have never seen. If you don't mind me saying, a__ lifelong ambition to fulfill my dream. What have you done to me?"_ A pitiful expression was on Saïx's face as he sang the lines._ "I'll never be the same; I'll tell you for sure. I'll never be the same; I'll tell you for sure. I'll never be the same; I'll tell you for sure, oh."_

Saïx took the Superior's hand in his own free hand and looked him straight in the eyes. Xemnas, of course, looked away, blushing furiously.

"_You really are my ecstasy, m__y real life fantasy, oh yeah. You really are my ecstasy, my real life fantasy, oh yeah. There can be no other while we still have each other. There can be no other while we still have each other. You really are my ecstasy. There can be no other while we still have each other. My real life fantasy, oh yeah."_

The song ended, and the entire Organization XIII stared blankly at Saïx. Most of them had never even seen him show any kind of emotion—except for meanness, of course—let alone seen or heard him sing or…flaunt.

That's right: Saïx flaunted around the Superior, still holding his hand. Xemnas would've let go, but, frankly, he just didn't want to. Number VII's cool hands were simply amazing, despite both of their current dispositions.

"I know you want me," Saïx said and hiccupped.

Indeed, Xemnas wanted Saïx, but he didn't have it in him to do anything except stand there. Saïx, on the other hand, _did_ have it in him. However, before Number VII could do anything, Vexen took it upon himself to fend the drunken one off.

"Saïx," Vexen said, attempting to pry Saïx's body from the Superior's. "You're making a fool or yourself, you know, with your drunken antics."

"I'm not drunk!" Saïx hiccupped once more.

"What are you talking about!?"

"I'm not drunk, Vixen. I never get drunk, Vixen," said Saïx with a sly smile on his face.

Being called "Vixen" infuriated Vexen.

"Will you just liste—"

"Hey, Saïx!" The voice came from Xigbar who held a little Xemnas doll in his hand which Saïx immediately locked onto. "You want it?"

Saïx barked happily as if he were a dog.

"Then go get it!" Just as Xigbar threw the doll somewhere off into the hallway, Saïx ran after it while barking madly, and Xemnas involuntarily slammed into the wall in the same direction that the doll went flying.

"What the heck was that!?" Xemnas said, regaining his composure. He wasn't talking about Saïx, though. He was talking about the fact that he had just flown straight into a wall without meaning to.

"Oh, _that_?" Xigbar asked, resting his head on the back of his arm and letting the other arm hang by his side. "That was one of Zexion's voodoo dolls."

"Vood—AUGH!!" A sharp pain was inflicted in Xemnas's side, and he soon realized that Saïx had grabbed the doll with his teeth—his _sharp_ teeth.

After a few minutes of Xemnas looking as if he was being continuously licked by an invisible force, most of the other members got bored.

"I'm _bored_!" Larxene groaned. "I'm leaving."

Number XII left the room, and Vexen, Lexaeus, Zexion, Demyx, and Roxas following shortly behind.

"'Twas a good game, mates, but, like I said, I _always_ win the games," Luxord said cockily yet truthfully as he walked out of the room.

That meant that Xemnas, Xigbar, Xaldin, Axel, and Marluxia were the only ones remaining…until Saïx came back.

Before the others could make any ridiculous or snide remarks on what had just happened, Saïx shoved Xemnas against the wall and began to unzip the Superior's black coat. Xemnas, beginning to panic, looked to the others, but they simply smiled back at him with evil in their eyes.

Saïx, grabbing Xemnas's butt, moved his lips in closer for a kiss with hunger in his eyes, but collapsed on Xemnas's chest instead. Number VII was officially out for the night.

An awkward silence followed.

"Did he pass out, Xemnas?" Axel asked.

After a pause, Xemnas nodded slowly, Saïx's warm body still against his chest.

"Aw… Too bad," Marluxia said.

"W-what!?" asked Xemnas.

Xigbar laughed again. "You got that right, Pinky! That was hilarious."

Xemnas soon regained his composure and returned to his normal, Xemnas-y self.

* * *

Beer Pong! Anyway, I don't really know how you're supposed to play Beer Pong, so I just kinda...made it up. So, uh, thanks for bearing with me on that. And, sorry for not putting any entries of Xemnas's diary in this chapter. Just wait until chapter six.

Next, is the link for the song Ecstasy by ATB, just in case you wanted it. Hopefully this link will work, as I realized that any other link I tried to put didn't. .com/watch?v=1bVYgYW6410 If not, just go to YouTube or any other music source and search for it yourself.

Um...Oh, yes. I didn't exactly think that this chapter was all that funny. I tried my best, but who knows? Hopefully you guys like it.

Lastly, I don't own Kingdom Hearts, its characters, or anything else like that, and I don't own ATB's song...Or ATB, for that matter. Anyway, please continue to read this, and reviews are always welcome! Thanks so much! =D


	6. Chapter 6: Answers

Author's Note: Hey, here's chapter six! ...I don't think there's anything left to say right now, so let the story continue!

* * *

Chapter 6: Answers

Saïx groaned upon awakening. His surroundings, a little blurry, came into focus once his head cleared slightly. Saïx gasped a little as he realized where he was—half-asleep in Xemnas's bed. Number VII immediately sat up, but, to his dismay, his head began to pound.

Xemnas, busily writing in his diary at his desk, turned around to see Saïx frantically trying to find his coat. The Organization XIII men wore only underwear and black pants beneath their coats, and Saïx, of course, had been divested of his coat. Saïx then felt Xemnas's eyes peering into his face, falling down to his chest, and down even further to—

"Good afternoon, Saïx," Xemnas said, wiping away the almost unnoticeable blood that trickled down from his nose.

"S-Superior! Um, I…?" Saïx stopped talking. He was nervous, and he had no clue what was going on. Fortunately, though, he hadn't noticed Xemnas's nose bleed.

"You passed out last night."

"Last… night?" The last thing Saïx remembered from last night was playing beer pong against Luxord, but he kept lo—. "You've got to be kidding me…" he said to himself, and to Xemnas, he asked, "What—exactly—happened?"

"Oh," Xemnas said, blushing. "Nothing happened! Like I said, you simply passed out so I brought you here."

Saïx eyes widened.

"_No_, not like that!" Xemnas waved away the "silly" idea. "I was going to take you to your own room, but I thought that it would be best if I kept an eye on you until you recovered."

"Oh," Saïx replied. "Thank you, Superior."

Xemnas smiled affectionately, but, to Saïx, it only appeared to be a mere friendly smile.

"What time is it?"

"A quarter past one," Xemnas replied, returning to his diary.

"I slept all morning?"

"Yes."

Saïx frowned, and got up from Xemnas's bed. He wavered a little, the limbs in his legs feeling like jelly, and managed to walk over to Xemnas.

"I'm glad to see that you're putting my gift to you to use."

Xemnas calmly closed the little black book, trying not to make a scene by slamming the book shut.

"Where is my coat?" Saïx asked after realizing that Xemnas wasn't going to respond to his previous comment.

"It's on the rack by the door," Xemnas said, not daring to look Saïx in the face.

"And my shoes?"

"By the same rack."

Xemnas turned around, once more, to see Saïx and his bare chest. Compared to Xemnas's caramel complexion, Number VII was pretty pale, but, then again, so were the other Organization XIII members. And, despite being muscular, Saïx was pretty skinny, as well.

"You must not eat a lot," Xemnas remarked, and Saïx smiled devilishly.

"You want me?" he asked, running his hands across his sexy chest. Instead of putting his coat on, he began to unzip his pants, and an enticing, pouty expression was formed on his face. "Then come and get me."

Too bad that didn't actually happen! That probably would've been the case if Saïx was still drunk, but, of course, he was sober. So, Xemnas's sick fantasies must be seeping out into the story. What really happened was…

"You must not eat a lot," Xemnas remarked, startling Saïx.

"Not particularly," replied Number VII. Saïx slipped on his coat, zipped it, and pulled on his shoes. His pants, mind you, remained zipped.

Ironically, Saïx's stomach growled at that time, and the slightest hint of red spread across his cheeks. Xemnas chuckled. "It's okay," the Superior said. "I've gotten a little hungry, myself."

Xemnas stood up from his chair behind the desk and walked over to Saïx, opening the door.

"Lunch?"

Saïx nodded.

* * *

During lunch, Saïx tried to get the truth of what happened the previous night. However, to Saïx's dismay, Xemnas kept on saying that "nothing at all happened" and that Saïx "simply passed out." That was only partially true, but Saïx didn't know. He had to get some answers…From whom, though?

After Number I and VII finished their lunch together, Xemnas stood up from his seat and said, "I'll be heading off to Kingdom Hearts now."

"I'll meet you there later," Saïx replied.

"Very well," Xemnas said and walked off, secretly wishing that Saïx was coming with him.

Saïx frowned, but he had a stern and determined look in his bright yellow eyes. He would get his answers.

* * *

Xaldin sat on the couch reading Xemnas's diary aloud.

"_Entry 3_

"_Oh my, gosh! Saïx is sleeping in my bed! How about I start from the beginning? It happened last night._

"_Well, Axel was hosting a beer pong match between Saïx and Luxord, hoping, like the rest of us, that Luxord would finally be beaten at something. However, we all got our hopes up for two reasons. 1) Luxord wins at every game, and I mean _every game_, and 2) Saïx is terrible at ping pong and beer pong. So, of course, abiding by the rules, Saïx had to guzzle down all that beer. I think it was his first time drinking—"_

"His 'first time'?" ejaculated Axel. "Makes it seem like he was talking about sex."

"I remember _my_ first time," Marluxia sighed. "Oh, Vexen…"

Everyone's eyes widened at his remark.

"I remember when we did it. We were on the kitchen counter, and Vexen did this sexy—"

"The food is forever spoiled!"

"You did it where I cook everyone's _food_!?"

"Awkward turtle…"

"Ha ha ha!!!"

"Moving on," Xaldin said, giving Number XI a disgusted look.

"_I think it was his first time drinking. I could tell by the look on his face when he tasted it. Anyway, Saïx was unable to return any of the balls, had to drink all those cups of beer, and, thus, got drunk. Drunk. …Drunk. Strange, yes? Well, anyway, Saïx got strange, as well, and a little _too_ affectionate with me. In front of everybody._

"_At first: a smile. Then: a marriage proposal from him to me. After that: karaoke dedicated to me. Awkward, right? It only got worse. However, before I go on, I want to say that Saïx has such a beautiful voice. He can actually sing, like Roxas, who sounds just like Jesse McCartney. Also, I believe the song that Saïx sang came straight from his would-be heart—I could see it in his eyes, the 'Passage to the Heart, Soul, and Mind' as humans would most likely call it._

"_Once that whole deal was over with, Saïx started dancing all around me saying 'I know you want it,' and, oh, how I wanted it. But I couldn't have him—not then, at least. Everyone was there, and I have enough sense and dignity to not strip and ride Saïx all night long right then and there! They may call me Mansex—and I absolutely despise that name—but I will not live up to that name."_

"Isn't he the hypocrite?" retorted Axel. "Saying that he 'will not live up to' the name 'Mansex,' yet he wants to do Saïx."

"Or be done by Saïx," Xigbar added in.

"Either way, what he said was a contradiction to what he said."

"What?" asked Roxas, a little dumfounded.

"He means to say that the Superior basically contradicted himself," Xaldin said, clearing things up.

"That's what I said."

"Yes, but because of Roxas's stupidity—most likely a common trait shared by he and Sora—I had to make what you said understandable."

"Hey!"

Xaldin ignored Roxas. _"After Vexen's futile attempts of ending Saïx's drunken antics, Xigbar took the initiative to 'borrow' one of Zexion's voodoo dolls—yes, Zexion's voodoo dolls are a quite fitting object for him as he _is_ master of illusions, and, in my opinion, the result of what happens when you play with voodoo dolls is just an illusion—and made Saïx 'fetch' it. And he did, indeed, fetch it. And bite it. And lick it. I felt it all, from slamming into the wall to being carried in Saïx's mouth._

"_When Saïx returned, after most of the members left, I was slammed against the wall a final time, only by Saïx this time, and, grabbing my butt, he tried to kiss me. He didn't get far enough, seeing as he collapsed on top of me._

"_After trying and failing to get over the humiliation of a drunken Saïx's efforts to seduce me, I was going to take him back to his room where he would stay for the rest of the night, and thought better of it. Why would I leave poor Saïx alone when he would wake up the next morning disoriented and such when I could just look after him myself? And, of course, there was the prospect of divesting him, and who am I to pass _that_ up?"_

"Uh…okay…"

"Wow."

"The Superior sure does have a different side that no one else besides him knows about. I doubt that even Wolf Boy knows about that," Xigbar said casually.

"_When I got back to my room, I gently laid Saïx on the bed before stripping him of his coat. He'd be more comfortable without it, right? I was going to take off the rest of his clothes, but I thought better of it. If he woke up without them, how would he react? Maybe he'd accept it and pounce on me. Rawr."_

"'Rawr!?'" Xaldin exclaimed.

Xigbar laughed.

"_I hadn't realized how skinny Saïx was, despite his slightly muscular build. He looked so peaceful and his body so beautiful lying on my bed. Anyway, I had a feeling that he wouldn't possibly wake up until the morning, so I had my fun with him while I could. First, I slipped off his shoes and threw them across the room. They would only get in the way." _Xaldin's eyes, just like everyone else's, grew wide at the statement. _"Next, I ran my hand along his toned muscles and nice, cool flesh. Then, I grabbed a camera and took some pictures—memories. Lastly, I realized how tired I was, so I lay down next to him, wrapped my arms around him, and slept._

"_So, here I am, sitting here in my desk chair writing this. Holy Kingdom Hearts—he woke up!"_

"That's the end of the entry."

A silence washed over the room.

Xaldin cleared his throat. "So, uh—"

"That was awkward…" Roxas said.

"Like I said before," commented Axel. "Awkward turtle."

"You got that right, dude."

Before Marluxia could say what he was going to say, a blue-haired head appeared from behind the couch—a blue-haired head with angry yellow eyes.

"HOLY %$#, it's Saïx!" Xigbar exclaimed.

Xaldin immediately tossed the book up into the air, attempting to hide the evidence. Unfortunately, it landed on top of Roxas's head.

Marluxia scrambled over to Axel and hid behind him, as did Roxas, the diary still lying across his hair.

"Is that the Superior's?" Saïx asked, surprisingly calmly, despite the vexed look on his face.

"If we say 'yes' will you hurt us?" Marluxia asked.

"You all should be thankful that I don't happen to have my Claymore on hand…Although…" Saïx shook his head and the angry expression faded away.

"Were you there the whole time?" asked Axel.

"Guessing by the redness of his face, I'd say he was." Xigbar laughed.

Saïx frowned.

"I wouldn't normally approve of this, but, considering my dilemma, I'll let you all go." Saïx stood to his feet and started to walk away. "Don't think that I'm in the least bit grateful."

Saïx left the room, his cheeks growing ever redder. Once he turned the corner—hence being out-of-sight—he leaned against the wall and put his hand to where his heart would be…If he had one.

* * *

XD In case you didn't know, Jesse McCartney is Roxas's voice actor in the English versions of the Kingdom Hearts games. McCartney's also a singer, who really isn't that bad. Well, he's gotten better over the years, but that's just my opinion (and I'm no fan of his, either).

I brought back an entry of Xemnas's diary, but no song/video/thing. Xemnas has a naughty mind, lol.

The number of chapters left in this are dwindling down to only one or two more after this one. I feel like it's time to end this--once and for all! ...Sorry, I'm being dramatic.

Anyway, thanks for all the reviews and favorite story and stuff like that. Please review some more and keep reading! Thanks! =D


	7. Chapter 7: Confessions

OH MY GAWD. I FINALLY FINISHED THIS FANFIC. FOREVER.

So, to tell you guys the truth, I wrote the first half of this fanfic around the time that I wrote the other chapters (a little less than a year ago Sorry), but then I had major writer's block. And during that time, I came to realize how horrible and disturbing this fanfic truly is. My brain bled and rotted when I went back and re-read this. However, I couldn't leave it unfinished, so I've spent a whole year away trying to think of a way to end it once and for all. So, sorry for everyone who's been waiting forever for this final chapter. Please forgive me.

* * *

Chapter 7: Confessions

"My tongue is… unh… stuck," said a nondescript, moaning voice from behind a random door in the Castle. Vexen, who was walking right past the door at that moment in time, stopped dead in his tracks, eyeing the door suspiciously.

"Who cares?" asked a second nondescript voice. "Just *hic* keep on going. Unh…"

"Ouch, that really hurts."

"Stop whining and go *hic* faster."

"But, I don't want this…"

"Oh, shut up." The second voice hiccupped once more.

"Don't… unh… stop," said yet another nondescript voice.

Vexen was highly disturbed that whatever was going in there, there were three different people.

"But, guys, you're both hurting me… Unh…"

"We're almost *hic* done…" said the hiccupping voice.

After a pause, the third voice announced, "Okay, we're done."

"Thanks goodness!" cheered the first voice. Vexen then realized that the voice belonged to little Number XIII, Roxas.

Vexen gasped. Although he didn't particularly _like_ the little twerp, Vexen couldn't stand for the molestation of a member. After all, Vexen was constantly molested himself, but by Marluxia, of course. And, for some reason, he highly doubted that one of the voices in the room belonged to the infamous Marluxia.

Roxas and the two others inside the room looked up to see Vexen who had just barged in.

"B-but, what…?" Vexen stammered, utterly bewildered. "I thought…"

"What are you *hic* going on about, Vexen?" Zexion asked, confused by Vexen's confusion.

Roxas was sitting on a stool, holding an extremely icy-looking sea-salt ice cream bar. Zexion was standing beside him, swaying for some unknown reason, and Demyx was there, as well.

Demyx spoke up. "Umm… I kind of dared Roxas to lick an ice cream bar that I dipped in your Super-Freeze Potion—"

"You were in my laboratory!"

"Never mind _that_," said Demyx, casually waving away the idea. "Anyway, I dared Roxas to lick it, but then his tongue got stuck. So we got Zexion to help us get it off."

"But," Roxas said, laughing a little nervously, "we had to spike his drink a little beforehand 'cause he wouldn't help us at first."

Vexen, who had been staring at the three Nobodies with bewilderment, changed his facial expression into a glare, gave a great huff, and stormed off, clearly upset that he had been disrupted from doing his errands.

Roxas gasped. "Oh, gosh! I almost forgot about it." Number XIII ran for the door and zoomed off in the opposite direction that Vexen went.

"Weird… I wonder where he's off to…" Demyx pondered.

?

"Sorry I'm late," Roxas puffed. He had run all the way back to where the others were. "You can start the story now. …Sorry I held you up," he added.

Axel, Xigbar, Xaldin, and Marluxia looked up at Roxas.

"What makes you think we were waiting for you?" spat Xaldin.

"Be nice, dude." Xigbar smiled slyly. "The poor kid just got back from having his tongue stuck to ice cream—you should give him a break."

"But—how did you know about that?" Roxas asked, but Xigbar merely laughed it off.

"You should've seen the look on Vexen's face when he heard your voices. Got the wrong idea, no doubt."

"Can we just get on with it? And I'll start over so you can stop pestering me about the boy," said Xaldin nastily. He cleared his throat and began once more.

"Hey, Roxy…" Axel said, sliding over next to Roxas on the sofa. He put his arm over Roxas's shoulder, but Roxas quickly shrugged it off.

"And, one thing before I begin," Xaldin said. "If you think anyone may be coming, please _don't_ hesitate to say something."

"Yeah. We don't want wolf-man showing up again," added Xigbar, referring to the previous day.

"_I'm in a bit of a dilemma at the moment. While documenting important information on the heartless populations of the different known worlds, Saïx came into my office. He seemed quite keen to tell me something, but I just didn't have time then, so I promptly dismissed him. However, instead of obeying my command, he kept on trying to say something, and, uncharacteristically, he kept getting tongue-tied. I really do care about him, but I couldn't possibly prohibit any distractions, and, in my rush to get him out of my office, I accidentally tipped over my bottle of ink, and the black liquid proceeded to stain all my files. I shot up my hands in sudden rage and hit poor Saïx in the face. I honestly hadn't meant for that to happen; it was a total disaster. I quickly apologized to him, and he left without a further word. I haven't seen him since, and, yet, that's all I can think about."_

Xigbar erupted with laughter. "I can't believe he hit him in the face! I wonder if he hit him in the X. That'd be even funnier."

At that time, Saïx walked into the room, his face expressionless. However, his eye was black, and it took all that Xigbar had to refrain himself from laughing hysterically. Before Saïx could see it, Xaldin tucked the little black book into his coat pocket, safely out of sight.

"What are you up to? Don't you have missions to do?" Saïx asked, giving them all an extremely dirty look.

"We should ask the same of you," Axel replied.

"My business is of no importance to you." He then smiled his smug, Saïx-y smile. When no one said anything, Saïx spoke again, saying, "I suggest you all get to work immediately." Saïx turned and left.

?

Xemnas stood at the Altar of Naught, his arms spread wide as if to embrace his beloved Kingdom Hearts. He was in his favorite place, yet he didn't feel very well.

'_I hit Saïx in the face! Never before have I felt so ashamed… so idiotic…'_

"Xemnas…"

Xemnas turned around, dropping his arms to his sides. It was Saïx—with a blackened eye.

"Listen, sir," Saïx began, coming closer to his Superior. "About earlier…" His eyes fell to the floor.

"S-sorry about that," said Xemnas, turning a little red from embarrassment.

"It's alright," Saïx replied, his gaze returning to the Superior. "And, another thing—what I was trying to tell you before…" He grew silent.

"…Yes?"

"I-I know how you… _feel_," said Saïx, realizing how silly he must have sounded, using that word that they truly couldn't understand the meaning of, "about me."

Xemnas tried to speak, but no words came out.

Saïx took a few steps towards Xemnas before continuing. "…Although I don't remember it, I know what happened when I was… inebriated. And, most of all, I know how _I_ feel about _you_." His cheeks burning slightly red, he took Xemnas's hands in his own and looked him straight in the eyes. "I love you," Saïx said. "I really do."

"I… I love you, too."

?

Xemnas sat at his desk, re-documenting his reports and attempting to read through the dark ink stains. He sighed as he realized that his efforts were futile and decided to write in his diary, instead. However, it was not in its usual place. Xemnas got up and looked around his room for it, but he couldn't find it.

"Saïx," he said, "have you seen that precious diary you gave me? I can't seem to find it."

"No," replied Saïx, "but I think I may have a notion as to where it is."

?

"… _He took my hands in his own, and finally, he said the words that I'd been longing to hear._

"'_I love you. I really do.'_

"_I was so happy that the only words I could muster were, 'I love you, too.'"_

"The entry ends there," Xaldin said to the group once he'd finished reading.

Everyone was speechless, but not because of the words Xemnas had written.

"Your life ends here!" Xemnas said angrily.

Xaldin flinched, and, not wanting to turn around and face the wrath of the Superior and Saïx who were presently standing behind him, he simply said, without turning around, "Xigbar and Marluxia stole it. I was forced to read it."

Xigbar and Marluxia shot up from their feet, barking angry retorts at Xaldin for ratting them out.

"Don't worry," Xemnas said, "You will be punished—every single one of you."

* * *

Oh, man. It's over. Sorry about the really crappy ending. Seeing as I barely ever finish any story I write, the endings don't normally come out quite right when I do finish them.

Anyway, I want to thank everyone who actually read the whole thing-or most of it... or some of it. Just, thank you for reading.

Once again, I'm _really_, _**really**_ sorry about the long wait and the crappiness of the whole entire fic. Thank you for everything guys, and, like always, don't forget to review!

Merry Christmas! =D


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